And, of course, the use of "V Carve" to describe both the program and the toolpath, which are two very different things, doesn't help.
Also, setting the male start and flat depths both to half the female flat depth in the instructions makes a confusing pattern that is entirely unnecessary.
To reiterate: The male flat depth controls the open space between the parts when they are glued together. It can be any number between some small value and an arbitrary large value, subject to machine and bit limitations. The male start depth controls how far the male sits into the female. I recommend a value that is a bit less than the female flat depth to provide space for glue and the top of the V bit grooves in the flat areas of the female.
Good judgement comes from experience.
Experience comes from bad judgement.